I know of a structural steel contractor in my area, and their ironworkers have shirts that say “erection specialist”

Sometimes the jokes write themselves

I think something I’ve learned over the years from several harsh breakups and big time abandonment issues, is that the pain you’re feeling is an actual physiological response to the loss of someone you are chemically bonded to. This is old biology at play, older than civilization, older than our species, because apes and various other animals exhibit grief.

There is no easy way out of it. Your brain has to unravel connections that once provided positive happy chemicals from your proximity to that person. It makes sense, oxytocin and other hormones reinforcing pair and family bonding, as they were once critical to survival. You just have to let it hurt, until it doesn’t anymore. It could take a long time, but one day you’ll be at peace with it.

I really agree with you about immutables. Not only are they awkward to use as far as managing and installing software, I feel like they prevent people from learning how a traditional Linux system works by keeping them in the padded cell of read only root.

As far as arch, it only really took me a year of fiddling and learning on Fedora and mint before I managed to get arch running. Yes there were hurdles and growing pain, but it made me a better user.

I commented elsewhere about endeavourOS, but I have some other wisdom to pass along.

Keep good backups of your personal files, stuff you don’t want to lose, and don’t be afraid to try something new. You dont like something about how your system is running? Nuke it and install something else. Installing Linux is a cakewalk in most distros and rarely takes longer than half an hour (your mileage may vary with the low specs on the laptop)

I’ve learned a ton about Linux by trying many different distros, breaking things, fixing things, and occasionally distro hopping to see how I like a different offering.

There’s a lot of great content on YouTube that can help you learn, and reviews of various distros so you can get an idea of how things work without having to install it yourself. Have fun and don’t be afraid to fiddle with things.

Absolutely. The desktop environment you go with will be the biggest factor for ram usage. Check out endeavourOS, it’s basically Arch with an easy installer with some basics preinstalled that vanilla arch doesn’t come with. It has a great community and runs like a champ for me. You’ll have to learn how to install software from the command line but a brief YouTube video can help with that. It also has one of the widest selection of desktop environments I’ve seen in a distro. XFCE would likely be your best bet for low ram usage.

Install your software from official repositories and flatpak and you shouldnt have any issues. My latest install has been going strong for about 6 months without issue. Linux in general is quite stable unless you’re mucking about with things you don’t understand, and if you do like to live dangerously in that regard, it’s a great way to learn a lot.

If you’re worried about stability, keep good backups. Back up your important personal files, as well as your config files so you can reapply any customizations you had in place.

If anything happens that’s too tedious to troubleshoot, reinstall, it takes like 20 minutes tops and gets you back to square one.

You could also use time shift to create system snapshots.

I highly recommend Hyprland if you want a truly infinitely customizable UI. But, there’s a big learning curve to even using it, let alone installing it and setting it up.

You could use endeavourOS as your operating system, which is Arch based yet easy to install. I can’t speak to setting up Hyprland on other distros as I haven’t done it, but I’m sure if you look around you’ll find out what you need to know.

The part about preferring mania? Super accurate. During the year or so of dialing in the meds, my wife alternated between numbness and depression, and eventually climbed her way up to “Normal”

She hated normal. I had to explain that this is how life is for everyone else. Sure there’s highs and lows, but not every day is an explosive rollercoaster of emotions, and that’s a good thing. Stay here with me a while and see if you can learn to love it. Well, she did. And life is good. But there really has to be a lightbulb moment where it clicks that life without the meds is chaotic, destructive, and unsustainable.